“In terms of days and moments lived, you’ll never again be as young as you are right now, so spend this day, the youth of your future, in a way that deflects regret. Invest in yourself. Have some fun. Do something important. Love somebody extra. In one sense, you’re just a kid, but a kid with enough years on her to know that every day is priceless. (418)”
Chronic conditions are tough. 12 years of this gig, well, it’s really starting to get old. Read something that upset me. Knowing the little innuendos about your disease are one thing. Seeing them in black and white are all together different. Read an article in a medical journal that my specialist wrote about my disease. Studies done and the findings. I participated in most, if not all of the studies. It felt surreal . Like I was reading about a sick person. A very sick person. A very sick person who couldn’t possibly be me. Those symptoms belonged to someone else, certainly not me. ( Though they almost all did, much to my dismay.)
Sometimes the fighting gets hard. I wish at times that instead of being the warrior, someone else could fight the war for me and I could just watch and cheer from the sidelines. But in the “Handicapped Hope Handbook” it clearly states that I will never ever allow myself to go backward. I am constantly trying to find new ways to stay motivated for the battle, to move forward.
I am restless. I have decided it is time to shake things up a bit. Changing the easiest thing to change. Myself. Hoping it will be just enough to get me back in the fight. Something new. A fresh perspective.
“Complacency is devastating”~ or so a friend of mine used to tell me.
Photo credit to a man from my old photography group named Rick.
Perfect shot for what’s about to happen….
- New, Serious Morgellons Revelations (careman.wordpress.com)